Call me naïve, but I didn’t realize Thanksgiving was controversial. Two clicks into my Google search on “Thanksgiving,” I am informed that the first Thanksgiving did not take place in 1621 (because “people have been giving thanks for as long as people have existed”), the people on the Mayflower weren’t called “Pilgrims” (they called themselves “Saints,” and they didn’t wear black and white clothes with big belt buckles), they didn’t come seeking religious freedom and they didn’t land on Plymouth Rock.

Who knew? Now the sweetest of celebrations is embroiled in controversy (and I’m not just talking about the pumpkin pie).

Why is it so hard to be thankful? Does saying “thanks” for some great gift make you feel somehow less? Does saying “Thank you” make you feel uncomfortably indebted, incapable or inept? Do you express gratitude gratuitously or grudgingly?

Thanking Ms. Jones is a given. You probably have pre-printed “Thank you for your patronage” postcards and loyalty programs for her. She’s looking for a thankful company who appreciates her.

So is your staff. How do you express your thanks to them? Sure, a paycheck is a nice way to say “Thanks,” but I guarantee they’ll work harder and expect less if they feel truly appreciated, valued and respected on a spiritual, emotional and mental level – not just financial.

I don’t recommend tofurky or trite “Thank you’s.” You can’t fake Thanksgiving. We hope yours is blessed.